Caffeinated Life~The Fear of What’s Next

I’m not a coffee drinker. Never have been. I prefer a cold carbonated drink that fizzes on ice. But if I could order a tall, warm cup of security, cut the drama & bad decisions, add dreams, and hope, then top it with extra love, I’d order it today.

I had a tough day yesterday. Life is ever-changing and I’m in this holding place, it seems. Sometimes God says “Yes”, sometimes God says “No”, and I think sometimes he says “Whoa”.  When I hear (or feel) him say “Whoa”, the Reiner (reining is a competitive equine sport-they call it Western Dressage) in me comes out. When I say “Whoa” to my horse, that’s an indication for him to not only stop, but to back up as well. So, I’m in a place in my walk where I hear God whispering “Whoa”. Stop and back up. (Please tell me that at least one of you is in the “Whoa” part of life too!) When I say “Whoa” to my horse and he creeps forward, I gently remind him that he needs to stop, then draw back. He needs to draw back (with his feet) to me. I get the same gentle reminder from God on occasion.

I had gone to bed last night with a heavy heart and eyes full of tears. My husband has been extremely busy farming, so I am feeling like a single parent and have just been very overwhelmed with the day-to-day activities and the aloneness. I laid there not a minute or two and remembered that today was the day for me to have read my chapter and be prepared to write about it. I reluctantly picked up my book and opened to it find the scripture above. As the tears flowed, I thanked God for meeting me in my moment of emotional weakness and frustration. I thanked him for his sweet words and for the loving reminder that I should not be troubled.  The reading of this chapter sank deep into my heart. I read the part about the seasons more than once. (pg. 127) I tried to identify which season I was in. I felt my mind wander for a minute as I thought about how long I might be here.

In Max Luccado’s book Fearless, he writes, “Embrace it. Accept it. Don’t resist it. Change is not only a part of life; change is a necessary part of God’s strategy. To use us to change the world, he alters our assignments.” In the same paragraph he also reminds us that Gideon was a farmer gone General. Mary went from being a peasant girl to the Mother of Christ. Paul was changed from a local Rabbi to a world Evangelist. God changed David from a Shepherd Boy to a KING! God makes reassignments. I feel as though I’m in the middle of a reassignment of sorts…I felt my mouth move and heard my voice as I asked aloud, “God, what I am going to be?”

“God never sends you out alone. Are you on the eve of change? Do you find yourself looking into a new chapter? Is the foliage of your world showing signs of new season? Heaven’s message for you is clear; when everything else changes, God’s presence never does. You journey in the company of the Holy Spirit, who “will teach you everything and will remind you of everything I have told you.” (John 14:26)  (pg. 131)

I believe whole-heartedly that God gives us dreams. He puts dreams and passions in our hearts for us to use for his glory. However, it’s not hard for us to lose sight of those dreams and for our passion to diminish when life gets in the way. Especially when life gets in the way in a form that we least expect. Suddenly our dreams change, or we push them aside to deal with life. Maybe that’s where I’m at……you?

“I am leaving you with a gift-peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid. ” ~John 14:27.

Change is a part of life. We can look at our cup as half-empty or half- full. Either way, there is still something in it. And no matter what is in it, know that the Creator of the Universe will help you swallow what you are about to drink. He has left you with a gift. So do not be troubled or afraid.